Friday, October 24, 2008

Get it together people!

I am frustrated. I have had three different nurses come to change my bandages after my surgery last week. I have been in so much pain that it feels like I am never going to heal. Now I have an idea as to why it hurts so much. The nurse that has come most of the time always leaves me in more pain than before she came. The actual changing of the bandages is not too painful so I didn't understand why. Now I know that she just wasn't doing a very good job and was taping the bandages too tight so that when I sat down, they pressed on the packing and the wound. The nurse that has come for the past two days has made me feel so much better and in much less pain.
I know that with every job there are some people that are just better at their jobs. I get it. It is just frustrating that this happens with people that are in a field that takes care of people and their health. In the hospital, I saw a three different nurses. Two were amazing and sweet and made me feel well taken care of. One was a total douche and hurt me so bad when she took my iv out because she was so rough. How can there be doctors and dentists and nurses that are not good at their jobs? I know that I am being naive about this but it still seems wrong. If one is going to choose a job that puts people's lives and care in their hands, then do it well! Not to minimize my job but if someone leaves my department with the wrong shade of lipstick, it's not the end of the world and they will not suffer painful consequences for it. I do take my job seriously but I know that the burden of the health care field is heavier than mine. I am just having a hard time with the fact that some of the pain I have been in is because the person I am trusting to take good care of me is not doing their job the best they can. Phew, I needed to vent! Time for more meds!

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Turning into a pumpkin before your very eyes

This is probably the shortest and least coherent blog I will ever write. I am going into surgery #8 in seven or so hours. I will be short because of two things. One, my time of cut off is inching closer. I only have six more minutes until Ican't eat or drink anything and I have no intention on being up for any of that. It will be incoherent because the insurance policy I used to make sure I wasn't awake (ambien) has punched me in the face and I feel a little drunk off of it.
I have no intention on any sort of a creepy last anything. No friggin way. I will not reflect on my life in any way except to say that I love my life. I just wanted to let everyone know that I am freaking out. Like, a lot. I have had mini panic attacks all day (or week for that matter) about tiny details of the day. It has been torture. I know I will be fine. I know this. I know that I will be in a lot of pain and I have to accept that. I just can't believe that I have to get up in a matter of (short) hours and soon after that someone is going to cut me open. again. I will be fine. I look at it like this: I only have a few more hours to worry about it. Its almost over. I would love thoughts and, if you choose, prayers. Thats all I can ask for.
I hope I didn't rattle on too long and stupidly. It's what I needed to do. I feel a tiny bit better. I hope you do too. Thanks for reading. It means you care. Does it get any better than that?